Day two of 'losing it' and eating healthy. The eating part is going exceptionally well. I only had one time of really really wanting some chocolate but I turned my mind to other things.
I just finished (well partially) the 30 Day Shred video Level 1.. I couldn't do all of the push-ups so that's why I'm saying I did partial.. I've never been able to do push-ups, not even in high-school, but give me pull-ups any day and I could do them (back then).
It really sucks working out with a sore foot- I have no idea what I did to it, it's been hurting for months now and is just getting worse so that now I'm limping.. Agh better make an appointment. Grr.
I'm still in the mindset of having a lot of hope and thinking I can still do this, not drinking and not eating horrible foods. I hope it lasts.. I really do.
Working out made me realize how incredibly out of shape I am, I mean, I knew it before but my arms and legs are actually sore after working out 20 mins. Oh well I'm sure if I stick with it, it'll get better.
It's amazing how not being hungover in the mornings can really motivate you. I picked up the house, and folded and put away three loads of laundry all before 11am. For me that's pretty good. And Ava and I had a wonderful healthy breakfast together.. hold on I have to get something out of the dogs' mouth- probably some hard plastic toy she'll choke on if I don't retrieve it.. Yep, it was a plastic cap to a juice bottle. Of course. Then when I was throwing that away she went for my ziploc baggie that I had left out (that had sliced pears in it from lunch). Now mind you, this dog has about 10 bones, a thousand toys.. but no. She goes for small plastic (caps, lego's, etc), pencils, underwear.. name it. Luckily she doesn't chew on power cords. Now that we'd have a problem with.
Anyways I'm getting off subject now.
I need to pick up some weights to aid with the workouts. I had some little 3 pounders but the kids always played with them and now I have no idea where they are.. Oh well.

Today I weigh 186.4 lbs. How did this happen? I'm sure drinking beer almost every night and not eating too healthy along with never working out helped that, don't you think?
Well I'm sick of it, I've been sick of it for a long time now. Yesterday I went and met with a nutritionist to help me get on track, and to figure out how many calories I should consume in day, and do just get an idea of what an average day of eating should look like.

She found it pretty surprising when I told her how much beer I drink on a regular basis, but what can I say? I'm a drinker. So no more of that.. we'll see if I can do it. Encouragement would be nice but I've failed so many times already I don't even want to go there.

Having been skinny all my life (5'2" and usually around 119-125 lbs), it's a stark resemblance to what I look like now. I'm always exhausted, depressed and just plain miserable. I don't like going out or seeing anyone I know. I hate my picture being taken. Having three kids and this attitude isn't the best- I want a family photo- I want a cute picture of me and my son when I visit him at school- it's the little things.

I think if I can get my drinking under control (stop FULL stop), it'll help a lot. I mean, the calories alone in a beer- and then after drinking you want to eat totally fattening greasy food.. then the next day your super hungover and eat like shit.. so yeah, not a good thing.
Last week I replaced beer with Pepsi, so I allowed myself to drink Pepsi all day so I'd stay relaxed and feel good so by the end of the night I wasn't a crazed momma "needing" that drink. It helped and worked for about 4 days. My nutritionist suggested La Croix, as it still has that pop 'fizz' but no calories. I found Fresca at the store and I'll try that instead.

My meal plan is pretty simple and easy to follow, I already love fruits, veggies, whole grains so I don't think this will be too hard for me. I made out a chart of what I need/can eat during the day so that'll be nice to have as a reference.

One thing I was told to add in my day was to exercise. I hate to exercise. I hate getting sweaty and I simply do not have the motivation. But I'm breaking out my dvd's (still in plastic wrap might I add from the last time I felt the need to get in shape) and am going to start today. I have to do this. I have to stick to this. I'm tired of being depressed.

I bought a scale today which I've always thought of as the devil because your weight fluctuates anyways from day to day so it makes people real miserable. But I also know that when your burning fat your also gaining muscle so I know not to get too discouraged.

The good thing is that the food changes aren't too drastic- I can handle toast with peanut butter and some string cheese for a morning snack! And a 3/4 cup bowl of Fiber One cereal (which is actually really good and the portion size is perfect), a piece of fruit and some low-fat cheese. Lunch will be a usual sandwich and salad with a fruit and raw carrots, etc.. I mean I eat this stuff any way.. so I just need to get all of this junk food out of my house- which is hard with three kids.. we'll see how it goes.

The nutritionist, Vera, told me that we really only enjoy the first and last bites of our food.. the rest is mindless eating. I like that concept, it makes sense. She also told me that if I stick on this meal plan and exercise at least 30 mins a day, I should lose a pound a day. I'm good with that. Let's see how this goes.

This is day one, early afternoon, and I can already feel my body kind of 'suffering' from the lack of sugar I would have probably consumed by now- bad sugar I mean. I'm sure it'll take me a week or so for my body to not be so 'out of it' and accept that I'm not pumping crap in to my system.

It's lunch time now so going to fix some food then lay Ava down for her nap. Then the dvd.. we'll see how it goes, and sore I get!